Tuesday, May 31, 2011

water of my youth

This picture.

This picture my friends is where you will find me most days when I am starring off into space, lost in a daydream.  Cutoff shorts, bikini topped, sand in my toes, on my cruiser by the ocean.

After each daydream, I say a little prayer for it to come true.  Even for just a short couple of years, before my skin looks like it does when I squeeze it together.  See this is the thing about being almost 32 years old, you wonder why you took your twenties so serious.

It's the decade in my life when I looked the best in cutoff shorts, yet I was too busy trying to prove something.

To whom? I'm still trying to figure this out. 

Now it is going to seem crazy, when we actually put the beautiful house we bought in our twenties on the market and move to the beach.  I often wonder if we would look back and wonder what the hell we were thinking or would it be the best decision we ever made.  This is the debate I have in my mind.

F21 sweater, DIY cutoffs, wellies from Ecuador

Yesterday, all I wanted to do was see some water - it was a windy, overcast day here in Kansas.  My idea, although not the ocean, was to wade through the murky waters of Winfield City Lake.

I wanted to show my husband the water of my youth; the first place I went skinny dipping; the place where I shotgunned many Natty Lights.   Isn't youth bitter sweet?  You spend your childhood waiting to be grown up and your adult life remembering the simplicity of being a child.

Yesterday you wouldn't have found me dipping a single toe into the lake without a little fear of what it would discover once under the water, but 16 years ago without a single dose of fear I jumped in sans a swimsuit. 

The lake was not meant to be, five minutes into our car ride an offer to babysit our nieces arrived and off we went in the other direction.  Another time perhaps, I will relive the water of my youth and take my husband on a journey down memory lane. Until the time arrives, I will serenade my husband with bits and pieces of the girl I used to be.

[Say hello to my sweet Zoey, wondering what the hell Mom is doing!]
Until next time, 

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